When it comes to being a leader, I didn’t want to lose connections with those around me. I try not to act serious, although my thoughts are. I try to be a part of the group although it’s difficult at times to feel like I am or should be. I try to be the kind of leader that everyone can count on. The one that’s always there if you need help. The one that goes the extra mile. The one that does the work so that others don’t burn out. The one that bears the suffering.
I may not always be right or make the correct decisions. But I always listen and try to make the most of what I can offer. I try to be as humble as a leader can be although it may diminish my authority. I know I am a big part of what TANG is but I do my best to make it appear as if I’m not. The last thing I want is to get more credit than I deserve. But I do this to an unhealthy point of where I feel unappreciated. I believe the real and worthwhile work is done by the program directors and counselors. That’s why I always try to have some kind of role with a specific program (mostly Junior High, this year Juniors). Doing logistics and making sure things run smoothly isn’t exactly what I find to be emotionally fulfilling at times.
I was so happy to have my 8 year old cousin Ethan be a part of the TANG program in our first year of the Juniors Program. My love for TANG has always been sort of unclear to those around me, even family. I was so happy to be able to share TANG with someone so close to me . Ethan loves me as much as a nephew (but really a cousin) can love an uncle (but really a cousin) and vice versa. He couldn’t wait to spend the weekend with me. Ethan has never seen me in this type of setting. Ethan knows me as the cool uncle who at one time liked the same things at his age and who likes to play with him but only gets to see me twice a year which is not enough.
All this weekend, I just wanted to play and share with him my love for TANG. After the camp, my parents told me via Ethan’s parents that Ethan would proudly say, “My uncle is Thomas Yu. My uncle is Thomas Yu.” I was shocked… flabbergasted. Ethan was proud of me; proud that I was his uncle. I thought I did such a great job in hiding my role with TANG. But Ethan wasn’t fooled. What makes me all teary is that he loved TANG so much, that he was proud of me for leading it.
That just makes my day…and perhaps the entire year.
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